January 08, 2017
The thought of turning 27 this year spooked me a little. No wait. Make that a lot. As a young...
The thought of turning 27 this year spooked me a little. No wait. Make that a lot. As a young kid, 27 always seemed old. If any of my teachers are 27, I would think that they are old.
As a teenager, I thought 27 would be fun. You get to stay out late. You get to dress up real fancy all the time. Your life is in place. You are happy. List goes on.
Upon turning 20, I must admit. I was excited for adulthood. I was after all, in an environment where most of my colleagues were not my age. Turning 20 was cherry on the cake.
Then I turned 21. Wow. Freedom. Or so I thought. Nothing changed much. But the one thing that changed drastically soon after was the number in the ones placing. I remember my birthday celebration with my colleagues and I was so excited because I was finally a real adult. You are only an adult once you turn 21, right?
Then one of them said,
"After 21, the numbers just keep increasing. Without you noticing."
I laughed it off, of course because I thought it was ridiculous. I was bent on being the most awesome adult ever lived.
I remembered nothing from then on. The years went by swiftly. Then last year, I turned 26. Today, I met my old friends and we were sitting down thinking how the years have gone by. Then it dawned on us. We are turning 27 in a few months time. And for some of the 1990 kids, you are already 27.
It is scary. I am no longer in my early 20s. I am not in my mid 20s. I am in my late 20s. Age is slowly catching up on me. Technically I am still young but I don't have the energy of my 18 year old self. I would get really tired after a whole day of something.
At 18, I went to school and have many projects. I could still handle my CCA. Reached home super late. Get into MSN till 4am and get up at 7am to go to class. I would still have the energy to do so many things.
Now all I really want is my bed.
I had a meltdown today too. The thought of turning 27 is really scaring me. I feel like I am not ready to turn a year older. I haven't achieved things. I haven't gotten material things.
I will probably have those older than me who will be reading me telling me that it's ok. Enjoy being 20s. That I am still young. But before you do, I am sure you felt like this too at one point. I am sure that this is all part of growing old.
There are 7 stages of grieve. I am currently in denial and I am clearly not handling it too well.