You are ugly

Nobody should tell a woman to change how she looks. She shouldn't be told to lose some of her thighs. She shouldn't be told to g...

Nobody should tell a woman to change how she looks. She shouldn't be told to lose some of her thighs. She shouldn't be told to gain more weight. She shouldn't be told that her shoulders are not perfect. She shouldn't be told that her birthmark is an issue. 

No woman should be told that she is not perfect. 

I was recently in a situation where all that above happened. One by one came out of a room saying they needed to fix something about themselves. Almost everyone came out looking dejected because everyone felt imperfect. Those waiting suddenly checked on all parts of their body to see if there are any imperfections. At one point, I asked the rest if moles are ok. 

How do we define beauty? 
What is the epitome of a perfect woman? 
How should an ideal woman look like? 

Society has made it appropriate to publicly criticise women on their physical appearance. The media paints a false picture on women. Many times we see untouched cover photos surfacing, letting the general women know that it was phony. We try so hard to educate young girls about self-love. We tell them to love their body and make changes if health is a concern. But the truth is, everyone wants to fit into society.

I am guilty of not loving my own body sometimes. I would scroll through Instagram and be mad at my bottom heavy body. I am desperate to get rid of my chicken pox scars because it isn't perfect. It made me look like a beaten up something. I want to be fairer because I grew up believing that being fair is beautiful. I hate my height because my dreams of becoming Miss Universe was never going to materialise. I was always the skinniest girl until Gelare got their halal certificate. Waffles with a side of caramelised banana and chocolate sauce with two ice creams are sinful and yummy though.

It took me very long to love the body that I am in. It wasn't until one day when I stood in front of the mirror and had a good look at myself. I wasn't too bad. My bottom heavy body actually looks rather smashing. My skin, other than the pox scars was quite healthy. I am at an average height, perfect for forehead kisses. I was finally happy with myself until last week.

I knew before going in that my height, weight and my pox scars will be questioned. I was just very surprised that many of the others were being told of imperfections that they never even knew existed. Even having a birthmark on the wrist was considered an imperfection. Imagine her growing up very conscious of her birthmark and finally came to terms with it. Then suddenly a stranger said that is not acceptable.

Beauty is very subjective. What you consider beautiful may not be to me. So how can a template be created to assess beauty? How can you even rate beauty? There are no measurements for beauty. I came to realise that they were looking for Barbies and Kens. Yes, men were subjected to judging too. It was really so easy for them to look at you and tell you your flaws. When my flaws were being projected in front of me, I felt like I was being mocked at.

I made it through with my confidence and abilities only to come to that room and being denied entry because of flaws on my body. I find it ridiculous that if anything, I feel that the earlier rounds were quite unnecessary. It should have just been a beauty pageant. It's 2016 and beauty over brains still exists.

So what are you views? What is your stand on beauty?



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